Getting Your Mind Right: 13 Topics to Improve Your Thinking in Recovery

As always on WeekEnd ReCap, bring your recovery milestones to celebrate and let us know how YOUR recovery is going!

Today, I brought 13 topics to discuss for 3-5 minutes each that will improve the way we think in our addiction recovery about life, ourselves, the people around us and the future!

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Read The Transcript Below

what’s up recovered on purpose family thank you so much for being here for weekend recap right here on the recovered on purpose show don’t worry about the marks on my face I will be getting into them what happened and that’s a little story to tell you so today we’re getting we have 13 topics about how to get your mind right in recovery guys I love you so much enjoy the show and keep living recovered on purpose the black represents the darkness from which we came the white represents the light in which we now live and the red represents the passion it takes to live recovered on purpose

hello hello everybody Welcome to the recovered on purpose show we are doing the weekend recap you know on here we are always celebrating clean and sober time and the recovery time that we have so guys go ahead and drop in the comments where you’re coming in from if you’re watching the replay go ahead and drop the replay and let me know your uh clean and sober days we can celebrate with you tonight we have 13 topics that we’re going to go over quickly just to uh make sure that we have our minds right in recovery I have a few questions set up for you and make sure that we are you know keeping our progress going in our recovery guys uh if you were here for the very quick intro I do want to tell you what happened to my face while we are talking right now uh basically some of you are on the show where I was talking about the power of decisions and I’ll get into the decision I made why I chose to do this versus something else um but today was actually my first day training with the Professionals in MMA I’ve been going for a little bit and going to the uh the low lower level classes making sure that I’m like getting my body right and everything and today was training with the pros and I’m going to be training with the pros from now on so maybe I’ll have more marks like this on my face but uh it’s just gonna be how it is now and I am training for a fight uh I’ve already lost four and a half kilos which is what like 10 pounds in a week so feeling really good feeling excited about what I’m doing and I’ll get into the reason why I’m doing it in a little bit Erin good to see you brother good day mate good to see you coming in from Australia we’ve got Australia here Amy coming in 71 days clean and sober excited to be here tonight from Illinois we got the celebration lights Amy congratulations and I know that you have uh recently moved into your new place congratulations on that gotten the family back together and uh super super proud of you let’s keep going super proud of you so we’re gonna hop right into it we’ve got 13 topics we’re going to go over quickly um and while we’re doing this make sure you’re letting me know oh gotta turn off the uh celebration lights although we are still celebrating anybody that has a clean and sober date they want to celebrate drop it in the comments um but while we’re going through this guys make sure that you are letting me know how this is hitting you if a topic comes up that you know you’ve been working on or if something comes up that you have overcome make sure that you’re dropping it in there so that people that are watching that are in early recovery or people that you know are still trying to recover they find the Hope in that they find the hope in your story through this so love you guys let’s get into it I have one one more comment Pam what’s up Pam good to see you coming in with what that’s uh two years and five months oh you have uh you have what six more days until you’ve got two and a half years congratulations so proud of you love that you’re here love seeing you here amen amen yes love it and doing great thank you so much of course thank you for being here love to see you all right so the first one we’re going to talk about is the oh so dreaded triggers and now triggers um I have mixed feelings about the word trigger I I feel like in my addiction you know waking up was a trigger for me everything was a trigger for me whatever it was that I was doing I had to be high no matter what was going on in my life I had to be high but in my recovery you know I found certain things in early recovery that I had to stay away from a lot of these things included people it included places I didn’t want to be going to the bar in my early recovery I didn’t want to be going near the Trap House in my early recovery and I definitely didn’t want to be hanging out with people that I used to use with that’s obviously a trigger but now in long-term recovery what I’ve found is that I’m actually legitimately able to be anywhere that I want to be as long as I have a purpose to be there and I don’t have to worry about what anybody else is doing I have overcome the necessity to drink or use drugs I’ve overcome that Obsession to drink or use drugs like for instance I went to a went to a party a couple weekends ago and had a really really amazing time I’m probably the only sober person there it didn’t really come up in conversations and stuff because I was drinking a orange juice and cranberry juice mixed together and it’s a cool little trick for anybody out there that wants to go to a party and just not have the I’m sober conversation by drinking water if you get orange juice and cranberry juice looks like you’re drinking with everybody but you’re not you’re not and you’re able to just hang out have conversations you know and I had a great time there was like 80 90 people there dancing we were having fun there was a bartender there that was doing like fire tricks and stuff and I will uh I will actually post a video probably later this week uh maybe even this weekend because it was actually crazy I don’t the guy the bartender that was doing the fire tricks uh he accidentally lit his whole face on fire his entire face on fire in front of everybody I’m sure it was pretty pretty crazy for him in that moment but I have it in 4k I have the I have the video in 4k so I will be sharing that in a little bit and for anybody that’s just coming on don’t mind the marks on my face uh today was my first day training with the professional fighters and uh I got some work to do but I’m going to be training with them five days a week so I might have more marks on me like this but I’m gonna keep working to make it so that I’m blocking these so loving it loving it now I’m hopping back in here we are uh got Amy coming in yes love it Leanna coming in from Australia also we have two people from Australia coming in what’s up guys amen amen what state I’m in Victoria Australia has states too Pam good afternoon good to see you Pam always good to see you love seeing you here and Pam’s on like what nine years something like that yep oh nine years and a month and eight days that’s amazing um yeah there’s we need people with long-term recovery continuing to come into the fellowships to continue to come into these groups so that people that are you know in early recovery see that it’s possible and then people that are still addicted know that long-term permanent recovery is possible and likely if we do it so love to see it love to see you here Tammy coming in saying something good to see you Tammy good to see you Sam what’s up Sam good to see you brother yes yes hey sis good to see you Tammy coming in with nine years let’s go celebration life for nine years we always celebrate here on the weekend recap and again if you’re just coming in we are going over 13 topics very quickly we just went over triggers and the next one we’re gonna talk about is self-care let me pull that up self-care I don’t know about y’all but in my addiction I couldn’t even think about self-care self-care was not even a thing that that I did that I thought of that that was something that I could do now in recovery the the self-care is you know whatever we want to make of it how do we want to take care of ourselves do we want to spend a certain amount of time in our day learning do we want to spend 30 minutes a day reading or listening to a podcast if there if there’s something specific we need to learn or we want to learn do we watch a YouTube video for 30 minutes a day on that specific topic that’s self-care another self-care would be a spiritual routine something that we do in the morning or in the evening specifically to get our spiritual self-centered and connected connected to God connected to you know the higher power that we that God has clean and sober and just working on that relationship and having that routine to take care of ourselves and make sure that we’re doing that and what’s beautiful about that what’s beautiful about self-care is that we’re actually able to do this we’re actually able to have this in our lives now because in our addiction we couldn’t do this and now that we’re in recovery we have not only do we have the opportunity to but we have the responsibility we’ve been given Allah life again we’ve been given recovery it’s a gift and a lot of us are on borrowed time I don’t know about you all but I was actually literally found without breath and without pulse by the police I should not be here a lot of us should not be here in our recovery but we are so why why would we not take care of ourselves as much as possible continue to grow continue to progress so spiritual routine and then a health routine what is a health routine that you want to take on what is your health routine now and if you if you’re doing something right now if you have something that you’ve put in your routine for health if you’re taking a 20-minute walk a day if you’re going to the gym four days a week or whatever it is drop it in so that people that don’t that haven’t picked a health routine yet they can take the ideas that you guys drop in there and for some of you that are just coming in again don’t mind the marks on my face my health routine now I’m training MMA I’m doing about six days a week and today was my first day with the professor Nationals and I’m going to be training with them every day now and you know I got to learn got to learn blocks better because uh got hit a couple times so I’m gonna hop back in here good evening Linda good to see you good to see you Adam grow with me dog grooming good to see you amen I don’t know how much dog grooming I need but I I want to get a puppy soon as soon as I can so third topic overcoming trauma now it’s really interesting because they say that about 67 of addicts actually endured some kind of serious childhood trauma and for me I didn’t go through a serious childhood trauma I didn’t go through abuse or sexual stuff or anything like that but my trauma happened my freshman year of college when I had been out partying and drinking all night like I did every night of my freshman year college and I woke up to my phone ringing vibrating down by my leg I swam through the sheets find my hard phone with the bright screen that read 47 am and my best friend chucker was calling me and I remember having the conscious choice that I could either answer the phone like I always do with hey what’s up Chuck or I could answer the way I was feeling with uh hello and am I still drunken State I chose the latter twitch a soft voice replied hey what’s up why are you calling me this late I was just calling to say hi don’t call me this late again and I hung up on him and he shot himself and for almost a decade I was unable to share that phone call with anyone as I bottled down deeper and deeper and deeper with drugs and alcohol drugs now called to that point I was having fun I thought I thought it was all fun and games I was just getting high I was just you know drinking and partying and stuff but after that moment I consciously began using drugs and alcohol to cope with life to cope with the way that I felt and everybody’s trauma is different everybody’s trauma is different the things that they go through I’ve I’ve heard people talk about a divorce the exact same way that another person talked about childhood trauma physical childhood trauma the way that our brain works at those stages of life it reads trauma very very very similarly very similarly so whatever that trauma is that you have in your life I want you to become aware of it become aware of the thing that happened and then the way that I got over the Chuck thing because it took me eight years over eight years to tell anybody about that phone call but once I actually started to share my story once I started to share my you know that story about Chuck I started the healing process and now that that trauma has actually become a story that I tell on every single podcast I do on every single speech that I do and it’s become a power of mine now so by healing and overcoming trauma we’re actually able to turn it into a a superpower for us by overcoming that there’s other people out there that are still suffering from this trauma and US healing from it will actually Empower them and give them hope to overcome that trauma as well so I want you to become aware of that if there’s anything that you are that you’re struggling with right now any traumas that you have not overcome yet uh I want you to become aware of it you got to write it down what happened what the trauma was and then have a conversation with someone you trust if you want to if you if you feel like you can trust me you know always feel free to message my page I I reply to every single person that messages my page it’s me personally and I would love to have that conversation with you I love you all top back in here uh puppies make for good self-care and then they do and then they do what’s up Angie good to see you amazing to see you Jeremy what’s up brother coming in South Jersey strong represent absolutely but it’s going to be a long trip all the way from Columbia coming in from Byesville Ohio yes yes Tammy good to see you Jeremy with the January 16th let’s go let’s go celebration lights for the January 16th we have uh we are coming up what next month you’re getting your nine months let’s go Jeremy good to see you brother always good to see you and then we’ve got uh grooming saved my life puppies are good for self-care amen amen baby steps as far as making changes in health self-care Etc 11 21 2020 got the celebration lights up celebration lights let’s go let’s go we are coming up on two years in under two months proud of you Linda super proud of you thanks for being here we do recover yes we do yes we do and guys while I’m going through these topics if anything pops up make sure you’re dropping in solutions that you have to these to these topics things that you have dealt with things that you’ve overcome we’re going to get into different things that I want your ideas so that anybody that watches this episode in the future or anybody that’s on here right now can take your ideas and apply them to their to their own lives as well that’s how we grow as a community amen amen we will live a great life yes we will I lost my oldest brother this year to drugs I’m so sorry Tammy I am so sorry that’s and guys that’s a you know that’s a trauma right there and it sounds like Tammy you were able to get through that in recovery which is a story in itself how did you get through that what did you do to to continue moving forward to continue in your own recovery when that happened that’s a powerful story good evening brother you are great at replying and it helps and means a lot I remember having that conversation Amy it was like last week super proud of you super proud of you by by 60 days by 60 days clean and sober Amy had gotten her own place and reunited with her kids that’s a story that’s hope anyone out there that’s watching this or that watches on the replay you know recovery is possible and blessings and Recovery happen so do it do it we love you and we want you around Leanne from Australia good to see you amen Angie good to see you you are very welcome thank you for being here I love doing this I love doing this we’re going to get into uh in a second uh and a few few topics why I do it good evening from Louisiana good to see you Dean Leanne any tips negatively up give me four more topics give me four more topics Leanne and we will be there yes amen amen you’re all here and doing it and for anybody that’s just come on don’t worry about the uh the marks on my face I am back into MMA and today was my first day back with the professionals so had a good day had a good Training Day from Franklin Kentucky good to see you good to see you Linda once an hour do a thought check like stop and ask yourself what you’ve been thinking about help me become more Mindful and change all right awesome we need to get into the next topic because a lot of these comments are you guys are like by like prophetic you’re reading the topics so we’re gonna do empathy okay and what I have written down is the difference between empathy and sympathy because empathy is powerful to help people empathy is a very good thing to have it’s when we actually feel with someone like us for instance we can empathize with someone that is suffering an addiction because we’ve been there we can actually talk about the way that it feels we can actually talk about the thoughts that come up we can empathize with someone that’s there because we’re feeling it with them sympathy is damaging sympathy does no good for anybody and sympathy is when you feel for someone it’s when oh I’m so sorry that’s happening to you you know you that sounds like it’s horrible you know I I can only imagine how bad that is that kind of sympathy it doesn’t Empower somebody for Change and it actually doesn’t help either person in that conversation empathy is something that we can utilize to build rapport with someone to have the conversation right sympathy just says you know oh I’m so sorry and it’s almost like putting them putting them even lower by saying that we feel we’re not feeling for them but you know we feel for them we we are just sad that they’re going through it right so we get sad and that’s actually just a a cycle that does no help for anybody but empathy when we when we feel with somebody it makes it so that we can have a conversation with them that causes them to want to change because especially us in recovery when we’re empathizing with someone out there that is struggling in addiction and we can actually share with them how we were in that moment also the feelings the thoughts and and they’re like holy cow this person is feeling with me because they get it then we talk to them about the solution how we actually found recovery and what it’s like now like yeah I haven’t felt like killing myself in years I haven’t felt like I wanted to use drugs or alcohol since day 30 clean and sober this is how I did it this is how I did it and it opens up a lot of conversations it opens up a lot of conversations I talked to God a lot and he helped me through it I and my family amen and Tammy’s talking about uh she lost her older brother to drugs this year and she stayed sober through it and doing it with God I mean that’s the number one solution that I found doing it with God helping people whenever I’m dealing with something in a moment like if I’m if I’m stressed or anxious or or really sad about something going on I talk to God and I find somebody to help period it’s the best solution I found um it’s the only solution I found and I’ve tried a whole lot of things a whole lot of different things oh Paul good to see you opal congratulations thank you Linda thank you I am an empath I feel all emotions yeah yeah I get that and you know I used to I love giving massage I give massage to friends to you know whoever will take a massage for me basically and I used to it’s really interesting uh I would have this like this way where I would give a massage to work a nod out and I remember specifically I was given a massage to my friend Sean and he had this giant knot here this giant knot here and I worked on it and I worked on it and I worked on it and I got it out but then like an hour two hours later I had a knot right here and it was really weird it was really interesting to see that because instead of instead of getting rid of that energy instead of like getting rid of this thing that was going on for this person uh I took it on to myself and there’s a powerful place to be to be able to feel with someone and then get rid of the feeling for both of you to get rid of it for both of you and there’s there’s a lot of uh studies on counselors and psychiatrists and psychologists about they have to get a certain kind of stoic response to trauma conversations or two deep conversations about someone hurting because they can’t take that on to themselves because at the end of the day if they just saw eight people in a row and they take on all of that sadness and all of those things going on they end up getting depressed they end up feeling all that stuff themselves it’s a dangerous place to be so I’m an empath too and one of the things that I had to learn to do was separate the conversation and loving this person from the boundary of not allowing that feeling those angry feelings about what that man did to that girl and I’ve had a lot of those conversations but being able to be there for her in a way to feel with her and not take that with me outside of that conversation it’s a really powerful practice to have I have family still in addiction I get it Tammy and the number one thing that I have found is to stay recovered yourself be loud about it be proud about it continue growing keep being the best you you can possibly be and that will attract them one of the spiritual principles of the traditions of the 12 steps is we attract rather than promote like oh you need to get sober look at your life you need to stop using drugs like nah we attract by the way that we live in recovery so keep going Tammy I’m proud of you I know that it’s hard especially with a lot of people around that are still using and everything but I’m proud of you and keep going reach out and tell somebody keep on keeping on amen amen I’m grateful for all the empathy I get from you all hugs Tammy love you too Angie yes amen claps God every day one day at a time amen opal I am the type that wants to save the world yeah I get that type Jackie and we need more like you we need more like you I am definitely the type that wants to save the world and I am glad and super grateful that I found the savior of the world the one that actually saved the world and now I just get to talk about him and I don’t have to take on all that responsibility because I can’t save the world but someone already did I need one hello wrestling large dogs all day really does it to me I’m intuitive and empathic too I transferred I’m a dog groomer too I feel it amen I want to save the world I know me too hell yeah what’s your specialty uh from Idaho Falls January 5th let’s go Kelly celebration lights for January 5th coming up on nine months in five days congratulations Kelly super proud of you glad that you are here we have two more comments and then we gotta hop into the banners amen God is so good and being an empath is overwhelming sometimes yes and this is what I’m talking about we got to get this out we got to work on being able to separate our gift of empathy from allowing that gift to be contorted into harming us okay we can actually separate someone else’s feelings from ours we can empathize with them help them and leave that conversation without taking those feelings with us it’s a powerful place to be me too we need more love and empathy for others for hurting amen yes and guys we can feel empathy for addicts that are suffering better than anyone on the planet amen so exchanging bad habits for good ones okay so what is a bad habit and I want you to think about this legitimately think about this legitimately what is a bad habit that you formed in your addiction that has come with you into your recovery what is that bad habit what is something that you’re doing right now a bad habit that you know you have that you want to get rid of in your life one that you know you should that you haven’t yet but you want to get rid of it for me uh for the last and this is being brutally honest with everyone uh for the last couple months I knew I needed to give up poker the I play I was playing you know two three nights a week late at night was staying up way too late playing um the people that I was playing with I love everybody but I was surrounding myself with people that I knew weren’t bettering me to get to the place that I want to be with this with recovered on purpose was speaking with helping people and I knew it was a bad habit that I wanted to get rid of so what I did I made the decision that I’m no longer playing poker I no longer do that and I’m replacing it with fighting with training MMA which is a good thing for me it’s a really good thing for me and I made the decision because when I was 18 19 years old I was I had just gotten off of like 12 years of wrestling was a state state wrestler everything and then I was training MMA and I had I had my first fight card when I was 19. it was it was while it was when Chuck had killed himself and during that time I was on my way to training one day and I stopped at my dealer’s house I picked up and I overdosed for my first time and I woke up in the hospital and I was too embarrassed I was too ashamed to go to train to ever go back and I stopped and I just never went back but it’s been on my bucket list for so long that I want to compete and I’m older now I’m 33 years old but I made the decision that I’m gonna train and I’m going to compete because it is something that I’ve wanted to do my whole life and I’m not going to allow the years to pass that I actually have the capability to do it so that’s what I’m doing I exchanged one bad habit for a good one and uh I’m loving it and that’s something you know what is a bad habit that you have in your life that you know you want to get rid of you can comment it in the uh in the comments if you want to bring light to it and let us know we can all hold each other accountable we can support you in any way I would love to support you in any way um what is it that you need to get rid of and then let’s figure out a good habit that can replace it drop some good habits in the comments some good habits that you have for me like making my bed uh exercising reading listening to uh audible books and these kinds of things are good habits that I have in my life that I do every day and it makes it so that you know it fills that space that time to not be doing other things right so drop in the comments some good habits that you have so that other people can get some ideas for adding some good habits into their life okay some other good habits you know um it can be anything any kind of good habit spiritual habits reading the Bible journaling reading your reading your big book or your narcotics anonymous basic text you know these kinds of habits The Daily Reflections these kinds of things are are really good ways to stay on a path of of progress spiritual progress life progress and get rid of the bad the bad habits okay let me see if there’s any good good habits in here that we got let me see

keeping good boundaries that’s a that’s a really good habit uh smoking is bad habit yep I actually uh that’s a tough one but it’s only as tough as you make it and what I did was on day 30 clean and sober I wrote a journal to God I was journaling every single day and I still have this journal and it was December 5th of 2019 it was day 30 the first time I’d ever had 30 days I was journaling to God and I was like I can’t believe I got 30 days I made it because I felt like it was a miracle had never had 30 days before and I was like God it would be amazing if I didn’t smoke cigarettes anymore I want to show people that it’s possible to quit drinking using drugs and smoking cigarettes forever and I haven’t had a drag with cigarette since talk to God about it uh you know I I chose to hop on a treadmill seven days later you know and while we’re doing this okay there’s good habits to replace the bad habits with for smoking exercise is always going to be number one that I know of it starts to work our lungs it starts to make us feel healthier and if we’re working our lungs out if we’re exercising and get our heart rate up in our and our lungs are working cigarettes actually become less desirable we don’t want them as much okay I am epileptic now because of meth oof I’m sorry Jackie um I just I pray healing over you right now in Jesus name I just pray that she would be healed God that you would restore her mind because it has been proven in science that any damage that we have done to our brains we can actually fully recover from we are completely neuroplastic I pray that into her right now in Jesus name and God I just pray that you would put the right doctor the right worker whoever into her life that will help her never we cast out we cast out seizures in her life right now in Jesus name they are not welcome amen amen amen beating myself up when I mess up oh I get that Linda we’re going to talk about that me too I can make them all day long but keeping them something else yeah I get that I get that if we can make good habits you know and stick with them there’s the easy the best way to do it is to start small and keep it simple something that you can do in five minutes and do that for three months in a row every single day whatever you can do for five minutes for me the first thing I did was make my bed that was a keystone habit that made it so that I could start habit stacking and putting other good habits on because I’m I’ve shown myself I can keep a habit by making my bed every morning so if I can do that then I can add this other thing in so find something you do in five minutes or less and do that every single day for a couple months three months and then start thinking about another one you can do it all all things through Christ who strengthens us yes and notice how it says I can do all things that means that we have been given that power we can do it Christ strengthens us guys we’ll be right back taking a quick 30 second break and then we have a few more great topics what’s up for coming on purpose family I hope you’re enjoying this episode as much as I do when I’m making them guys if you’re getting any value from this if you’re seeing any golden nuggets that you want to share with your community make sure that you are you’re sharing it with your groups you’re sharing it with your personal page or your pages order that one person that you’re thinking of right now and their messenger so that they get this message and guys the brand new recovered on purpose website is up and it has a whole bunch of different merchandise and resources and the free calls with me so make sure you’re checking out recovered on after the show and if you are a loved one of an addict if you have a kid that’s suffering an addiction I’m now doing free calls so we can strategize and find out how we can get them clean and keep them clean love you guys so much and enjoy the rest of the show all right amen amen now we’re going to talk about sober activities and hobbies and for anyone just coming in uh just let you know don’t worry about the marks in my face I started training MMA again and today was my first day with the professionals and I have work to do to get up to a level where I’m not going to have marks on my face you might see more of them because I’m training with them every day five days a week and then uh on the sixth day I don’t know yet I don’t know what happens on the sixth day sorry I thought I put this on

I do have it on do not disturb I don’t know how that’s getting through okay so are activities and hobbies okay drop in the comments any hobbies that you have found in your recovery that you love doing okay um obviously you guys know some of mine I love to make videos I I recently found this where like I like to edit I like to actually see a vision of a video I want to make I even have a teleprompter so I can you know write the script for it and everything and then edit it together all fun it’s a fun hobby I also love paddle tennis paddle tennis is something I do once or twice a week with some really good friends uh it’s a great way to meet people I get to engage and I get to get my mind off of other things going on right and then I also love training I love MMA training I love the the feeling of competition the feeling of pushing my body the feeling of progressing that feeling that I’m working towards a goal I have a goal with it I want to do my first fight I want to win and I want to stream it live for all of you I literally have that Vision I’m making it happen so what are dropping the comments some uh some sober hobbies that you have found in your recovery for ideas because I know this is a this is a topic that you know some people in recovery have a hard time finding hobbies and things because it’s been so long since they had a hobby other than using drugs me my hobby was finding Ways and Means to get more drugs and then getting more drugs and using more drugs that was what I did that was my hobby and now I’ve I’ve constantly added new hobbies and I’ve constantly added new things in because what it does is it helps us to find ourselves it helps us to live a life that we want to live it helps us to you know have that have that progress and feel like we are taking care of ourselves and we’re living a life in recovery that we want to live that we choose to live so drop in the comments I’m seeing some of these comments let’s see let’s see some Hobbies see some Hobbies reading is a hobby is a really good hobby I love reading Linda what book are you reading right now right now I am uh almost done with spark and Spark is about the brain science of exercise and what happens with it to oh I’m not going to give it away because we’re talking about it a little bit in a minute but it’s a really good hobby walking walking’s a good hobby I love walking uh sometimes I’ll just literally leave my phone and just go for a walk somewhere um and you know look around people watch Walking keeping myself moving you know and getting my mind right Tammy I love it and it’s a really good place to connect spiritually also going on a walk and if we’re in a place where it doesn’t where it doesn’t look weird for us to be talking to ourselves you know where there’s not a lot of people around sometimes we can just go for a walk and talk out loud to God and listen to him you know it’s an amazing amazing Hobby watching n a meetings on Facebook amen it’s a good hobby gardening well why is this not opening you up what’s going on here you guys are commenting too much apparently does not let me open up anymore uh gardening okay well Pam I see gardening gardening is a great one I personally have not gardened before but uh it’s it’s really therapeutic for you know watching something grow I have plants I don’t know if you can see my plant here but I have a couple plants I was never able to keep plants alive in my addiction but these guys are killing it they’re killing the game I water them and everything and uh take care of them drying and watercolor painting I love it can you see if I can uh oh something is glitching on this so I’m gonna have to just like talk with uh without the banners going up and we’re gonna have watching n a meetings up for for the rest of the show maybe best sober activities workout I love it Herrera love it grooming large dogs that

oh there we go there we go grooming large dogs that want to kill me I started with the kids water paints yes I love I love art I tried to pick up painting I did it for a little bit for like a month in my recovery and it wasn’t like it didn’t give me that feeling that I wanted to get better and better at it wasn’t a gift of mine so proud of you it’s a really good thing to do um I loved it but I just didn’t feel like it was uh something that I could get super good at so I so I chose to stop and do other things four months still looking for hobbies seems to not be enough time Kyle each and every one of us has the exact same amount of time in a day so I want I want us to get that out of our head we each have the same amount of time and a really cool exercise to do and you’re on four months let’s go let’s go celebration for four months Kyle good to see you brother super proud of you stick around with us uh we’d love to see you here and man there’s there’s a lot to do in recovery read some of these comments about about Hobbies there’s a lot of different things to do exercise my favorite thing finding something to do it whether it’s going to the gym whether it’s picking up running or basketball or paddle tennis or MMA whatever it is and put it in your schedule like there is there is nothing more important than your relationship with God and self-care period a relationship with God includes Improvement includes doing things that we love to do that’s what a relationship with God is he wants us to live a life of of pure prosperity prosperity in every sense of the word prosperity and feelings and emotions and and loving life and doing things that we want to do so keep looking for them and just jump in brother Daniel Steele novel amen spend time in nature yes forgot been going to parks and lakes yes that’s a good one brother that’s a good one it’s a perfect place to connect spiritually Perfect Place uh in my first couple years of recovery two and a half years I lived really close to I was right by downtown Denver and there’s this lake or this river called the Platte River in the mornings I would go on a run and then I would end my run next to the river and just listen to the water flowing and meditate and stretch and just like think just think on life just think on recovery just think on God you know and think on my day it’s a really really cool place to connect spiritually when we can hear the water I cannot keep plants from alive for the life of me I get it brother and uh you know I couldn’t for a long time either but these are the first plants that are just like I guess they like me I guess they’re like I can live here I can kick it here they like me it’s okay if people hear you talking to yourself nowadays people just think you are talking to someone through Bluetooth yeah yeah we can even go like this while we’re talking to God yep yep just uh just checking in for the day just wanted to let you know that I’m feeling this and I’m feeling that and I love you and was just wondering if you could help me out with uh you know this job interview that I have today um is there anything that you wanted to tell me I would think that you’re on uh that you’re on Bluetooth get a mother-in-law’s tongue congratulations Kyle yes start a prayer group yes amen jogging the Aqueduct while listening to transformational and motivational videos yes that’s exactly what I did I would put on motivational stuff in my ears go on a run then I would pause it down by the river and just listen to the water and stretch and meditate it’s beautiful beautiful water is cleansing that’s why amen love it yes okay next one oh we already did this one uh just did that one negative thinking negative thinking so I want to talk about three topics with negative thinking number one is Gossip if someone is if you are in a group of people and the conversation is about someone that is not there walk away from the group unless it’s unless it’s something where they’re talking that person up they’re talking really well about them lifting them up to talk good about them if it’s if it’s negative talk about someone that is not present that’s called gossip and it’s damaging to your soul it’s damaging to your mind and it actually will make it so that you are thinking negatively about that person when you leave that conversation instead of thinking positively about yourself and about your life and about people around you I made that decision very early on in my recovery there’s a proverb about it that gossips are like a choice morsel going down to the deepest innermost parts of your soul which I don’t know about you I know that gossip is bad and if that’s the if that’s the spiritual way to look at it where it goes all the way down to the deeper innermost parts of my soul I don’t want it I do not want it there I am not eating of any gossip conversations I love talking about people behind their back when I’m talking them up I love that I love that conversation but you’ll you’ll almost never hear me say something about someone negative when they’re not there unless it’s to warn somebody that is getting close with them or something so yeah next one is self-talk what are your what are your constant thoughts what are the thoughts that you’re having in your head when you think about yourself when you think about your life when you think about your relationship with people with god with your family with your work what are the thoughts that you’re having I want you to become aware of these and start to think about you know what are the thoughts that you are thinking the most okay if when you think this if when you are are becoming aware of these if you notice that they have a negative pattern to them we have to switch that over to positive thoughts about you and interestingly enough in 16 minutes over on YouTube I have a video of positive affirmations for addicts and Recovery that’s releasing and I made it with you know I made it really cool I’m really excited about it um but I wrote all of them their original positive affirmations specifically for addicts and Recovery helps you with uh with thinking positive about yourself thinking positively about others forgiving others and just knowing that you are powerful knowing that you’re strong and if you listen to it with headphones and you repeat the positive affirmations out loud if you did that once a day you will absolutely 100 percent be thinking way more positively than you are right now and there’s good ones so check it out I’ll post it on the on the page in a little bit okay next mindfulness mindfulness being present in the moment is what mindfulness is okay so if you have one foot in yesterday which is also known as depression if you’re thinking about things in the past right and you’re not thinking good about them it’s depression if you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future which is also anxiety if you’re thinking about the future and what’s going to happen and you’re worrying about what’s going to happen that’s anxiety so if you have one foot in the past and one foot in the future then you’re peeing on the day and I know you guys have heard this one but it’s true we we have this gift called the present moment and we have to be willing to find the mindfulness that brings us present because that will be the number one most most productive way that we can look at a day if we know what we need to do today in order to set up tomorrow to be the best tomorrow that we’ve ever had and we do the best we can today at the tasks in front of us the way we treat people the way that we think the progress that we’re making if we do that today then it’s going to set us up for a way better tomorrow than if the today we’re thinking worried about tomorrow we’re thinking anxiously about tomorrow we’re worrying about what’s going to happen a week a month two months from now like if we’re if we are in a situation where we’re gonna you know we don’t know how we’re gonna pay rent if we sit today and we think about oh my gosh I don’t know how I’m going to pay rent I wonder what’s going to happen when I don’t have it what is my landlord gonna say then that’s going to hold us back from finding the solution whatever that thing is that we’re worrying about in the future if we’re thinking about that instead of thinking about the present moment and what we’re able to do and what we’re capable of doing we’re not going to be able to actually get the solution that’s good for us so become mindful good way to do that meditation good way to do that whenever we’re thinking about something in the future or something in the past we come to the present moment name like three things around us the colors and three things around us and then think about the next task we can do to progress amen hop in the comments real quick have a great weekend good to see you gossip and drama is also classified as an addiction yes get rid of that get rid of that a couple years ago I was in a meeting and they started talking about a female that was not there I sat there and listened and when it was over I went and told her what she what this said yeah I don’t know the situation um I don’t know the situation I’m gonna leave it at that I am going to check them out yes you’ll be feeding your subconscious yes I live in the future way too much yeah Kyle a lot of us in early recovery dealt with that a lot of us dealt with that and the sooner that you get present with and here’s the thing when it says one day at a time when we all hear that slogan one day at a time that slogan was never meant to say we stay sober one day at a time we fight to stay in recovery one day at a time no it’s we live one day at a time in the present moment and we live the best we possibly can that day that’s what that that saying was always supposed to be so we live one day at a time and we live a recovered life a powerful life setting up tomorrow to be the best tomorrow ever so as soon as possible meditation helps a lot journaling helps a lot setting goals helps a lot setting tasks helps a lot you can set a set a you know a type of Journal that literally writes down all the tasks that you’re doing today and our slots okay from nine to five I am at work from 8 30 to 9 I’m traveling to work from five to five thirty I’m traveling home you know and in that time block you just have work and then fill in the other time slots that you have with something that’s going to progress you and your life and then when it comes to that time you sit down and you do it or you go to the gym and you do it or you go to the you know Art Shop and you get the art that you want to do right and gp’s on her days a lot

amen amen let’s go all right stress and anger management uh stressing your anger management some of the best ways that we can actually mitigate our stress and anger is exercise I know I talk about exercise a lot but period raising our heart rate to 120 or 130 or above for 20 minutes or more this actually connects to our brain in a way that releases anxiety depression stress and anger it releases it it makes it so that our mind is actually working in a different way than it did before we exercise if we’re feeling stress anger anxiety depression any of that pick up a workout routine period pick up a health routine an exercise routine something that gets your blood pumping you will immediately within a week of keeping it good you will notice a change and it’s the only thing that keeps a lasting change at a level so you actually get to a point where you’re exercising you’re doing it daily you’re getting your heart rate up for 20 minutes you get to a point where you’re like your stress level could be here okay it’ll go down to a point and then it hits a plateau like we all have stress in our life we all have stress but it actually gets to a point where it’s at a low and then it stays there and as long as we keep exercising we keep going 20 minutes a day or more at 120 or 130 beats per minute we stay there our stress level doesn’t go up it just it doesn’t it works something happens in our brain with exercise another thing is journaling inventory keeping our inventory for resentments that we have fears that we have Angry Anglers that we have at people or whatever it is keeping that journaling keeping that resentment list and talking to other people about it make sure you’re doing that if you have an anger situation an angry situation at somebody make sure you Journal out why it is that you’re angry with them what they did what it affects in you if it affects your pride your your your self-esteem your pocketbook whatever it is that it affects write that down and then hit somebody up and do a 10th step with them just have that call with them and then amends amends is like my number one for stress and anger release if I have a stress about a situation or an anger about a situation at someone it almost is it’s fairly automatic for me I’m not afraid of Confrontation so it’s kind of my kind of my personality I will talk to that person basically immediately because I don’t want that in my life I don’t want to bring that into my tomorrow so today the best thing for me to do is make that amends so for Stress Management exercise journaling inventory amends okay next gratitude everybody comment something that you’re grateful for everybody right now comments something that you are grateful for in this moment I am grateful for every single one of you like legitimately I talk about this at least once a day with somebody else how grateful I am that I am that I have such an awesome Community like every single person that ever comes and lies or ever comments on posts or anything it’s always positive it’s always uplifting for other people it’s always about helping other people and staying in recovery you know when someone comes in they said I just relapse you know a whole bunch of people just start commenting and spreading love and stuff I’m super grateful for my opportunity to be here with you I just I love you guys so much okay drop in the comments things that you’re grateful for uh guys and take this list take these comments if you are looking for things to be grateful for get ideas from this list from these comments because these are things that you know I don’t know we can be grateful for these every single day let’s see

very helpful writing it out yes amen my newborn daughter Linda amen congratulations congratulations that actually deserves some uh celebration lights on the newborn daughter congratulations love it this live video and everyone here we’re grateful for you too Angie and we love you I’m so grateful for the support that I have around me yes opal amen Kyle is grateful for joining this live chat yes well if everybody is grateful for joining this live chat we gotta get we gotta get going we got to get more people in here we got to keep doing this and we got to keep showing up because I’m grateful for you guys you guys are grateful for this chat let’s keep showing up you guys know it’s uh every Monday and Wednesday at 8 A.M Central every Friday at 6 PM Central and Saturdays at 10 A.M Central Sundays at 8 pm Central that’s when we have these uh Saturdays and Sundays are with groups congrats on baby girl thank you all yes I am grateful Jesus put love in my heart for people I’m grateful I’m not sick through this chemo amen I am grateful for that too Pam we love you we’re here for you and uh super grateful that you’re always here super grateful you’re here I’m grateful for God waking us up in our own apartment since July 14th yes yes share share share yeah please share this out if you have gotten anything from this uh if you have enjoyed this conversation make sure you’re sharing it out to your groups to your pages or to that one person that you’re thinking of right now that you love that could use this message message to them all right uh uh gratitude forgiveness this is another thing that I talk about in the uh in the positive affirmations video uh literally forgiving other people releases us spiritually forgiving someone doesn’t mean we say it’s okay what they did forgiving someone means that we acknowledge what they did we don’t say it’s okay that they did it but we forgive them for doing it so that we can release the spiritual bond that is holding us and them in contempt we’re holding somebody in contempt by blaming them and not forgiving them and it actually talks about in the Bible if we go to the altar of God and we bring him a gift in order to talk to him and as we set it down if we think of someone a brother a sister that we are resentful at God says before you pray to me go to your brother’s sister talk to them release that forgive them and then come talk to me forgiveness is powerful make sure you guys are forgiving yourselves also it’s a really powerful exercise of writing out an amends yourself as if you were doing it to someone else all the things the addict self that you were the person that you were in your addiction writes and amends to the person that you are now and then read it to yourself in the mirror forgive yourself exploration self-exploration is beautiful in recovery we spent so long as an addict that was our identity now in our recovery what are some things that we want to do what are some beautiful things that we’ve always wanted to do we can learn and discover things about ourselves we can read a book and be like I wonder what I think about that we can try a hobby we’re like oh my gosh I love that you know or or yeah I don’t like that you know we can try new foods we can find things that we love in food you know self-discovery and self-exploration is incredibly incredibly valuable for our lives incredibly valuable for our lives and there’s try new things learn new things meet new people meeting new people is awesome whether you’re going to a you know a different kind of hobby or you can join a book club in your area you can go to different meetings than you’ve always been going to and go find you know some Old-Timers that have a whole bunch of wisdom and see if you can have coffee with them just get a get a conversation with them meeting new people and then what are you most interested in I want you guys to comment right now what is something that you are most interested in your life right now what is something that you know you’ve wanted to try something you’ve wanted to learn um a hobby that you’ve always wanted to do an activity and experience drop that in the comments because I want to know what you’re most interested in and drop it in the comments if you actually if you actually want to because I would love to be someone that holds you accountable that sees that light in your eyes afterwards after you do that thing because I’ve had that experience a few times my recovery where you know someone had something they wanted to do I helped him do it and then I got to watch their eyes light up telling me what what it was like tell me what it was like so I loved doing it would love to hear what you guys are interested in let me see what you guys are saying see what you guys are saying um hugs I’m most interested in hugs too oh that’s a different different comment a different thing I love food I love food too I love trying new food amends to self is a great ideal yes I did that and he was so resentful that he drugged me and set me up with the police I came to in the middle of a huge raid oh my gosh Nicole that sounds that sounds intense that sounds intense are you uh I’m glad that you are sticking and Recovery now though I’m glad you’re sticking here I’m glad that you’re here Nicole it’s good to see you taking classes in Colorado that will help people heal amen Angie I’m from Colorado I’m from Denver I am from Denver where are you from art cooking and helping others amen Nicole I wonder how you could add those three things together and make a thing of it I wonder if you could have like a group of people in recovery once a week who host at different places cook together and do art you know I wonder if that would be a good idea I am from Iowa oh but you’re taking class in Colorado amen I was on probation too I actually got early terminated I got I got like two years of my sentence knocked off uh because I was doing so well in my recovery so it’s possible just keep going do what you got to do pass your uas and you’ll be out of it soon I agree I agree cooking is an art 100 starting my journey into becoming a peer support specialist one step is two years clean in Tennessee amen all right we have one more topic and we have about a minute guys future plans future plans if you haven’t yet get the relapse prevention worksheet you can see it in the description of this video I have the link there for it it’s totally free resource and there’s an exercise and there’s a bunch of really good exercises in there you’ll actually really love the worksheet and uh one of the exercises is my life three years from now and I show you how to write your life your life three years from now your ideal life three years from now as if you’re there right now and this is different than living in tomorrow with anxiety and stuff this is something where you draw out your ideal life who you want to be what you want to feel what you want to have the job you want to be doing and you write it out and then you find out what you have to do and who you have to become to get there it’s a really cool exercise I love doing it love seeing other people so try it out guys I love you all so much uh it is time I’m about to get on the group coaching for the recovery speaker course love you guys keep living recovered

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Relapse Prevention Worksheet